What a week it has been. I feel like I’m sliding down the tallest slide in the world and I still haven’t reached the bottom.

My previous post was screaming loneliness so I’m thankful for everyone who has sent comfort even if it’s only through the comment section. I wanted to make it private, like how I always do with sad posts, but I’ll keep it there for now. A reminder that we’re not always rainbows and butterflies.

The internet still amazes me, though – connecting each one of us like that. How it can be so wonderful if used properly and with good intentions. Like how I had my first session of therapy today online. :) I don’t want to talk about it yet; I just wanted you to know that I’ve finally decided to ask for help.

Because yes, it has been really, really dark. Here’s another Sunday Currently.

Currently

Reading

Maybe Not by Colleen Hoover on eBooks. It’s Book 1.5 of the Slammed series and I just read it whenever I’m bored. I love Colleen so much but Slammed is only a 3 of 5 for me, that I feel like buying physical copies of the next books isn’t worth it. An eBook will suffice.

(Still) Watching

Friends. I took a break from watching because I can’t focus on anything the past week. Progress: I can now complete at least 2 episodes per day. :) Currently on Season 3 where teet and toot broke up.

Listening

To the K-Drama my Aunt is watching. It’s Start-Up’s last episode and she’s been waiting for it all day. Another drama added on my long list of to-be-watched.

Thinking

Of when I’ll be able to let go and finally stop comparing.

Wishing

For my mind to focus more and think straight. ‘Wag puro puso.

Hoping

That I won’t end up hating December as much as I hated November. I love this month. I really, really do. It reminds me of good things, of happy memories, of the kind of love I wish we all experience again.

Wearing

The floral shorts that I got from Brands for Less when I went for a short trip to Shuweihat Island, and my brother’s tshirt which I’ve been using for years (that is basically mine now).

Loving

The view from my bed that I have yet to organize.

(This took a while ‘cause I really can’t think of anything I love right now.)

Wanting

A hug. Like a real hug. A physical hug. Hahaha pucha, I’m so touch-deprived, I haven’t hugged anyone for so long. Lol. The only people I’ve encountered with lately are my Dad, Aunt, and some friends, and meh. My family isn’t the type to show affection (something I will change if ever I’ll have my own) and I’m not that close with the friends I mentioned.

God, I miss my friends back home. I’m so happy cause the friendships I have in PH aren’t shy to show emotions, be it a man or woman. Emotions are emotions! They’re normal!

Feeling

Lonely.

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I may be sad but at least I’m getting profit this week from my investments. Ha! Iba talaga magbigay ng pampalubag-loob ‘yung mundo. Temporary.

Good night. Thank you for being here. I appreciate you, just letting you know that.

Love, Amielle

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